Damnit, Leeds can't give me a tour!

So this is the new year
and I don't feel any different

the clanking of crystal
explosions off in the distance
in the distance...

so this is the new year
and I have no resolution

it's self-assigned penance?
for problems with easy solutions

so everybody put your best suit or dress on
let's make believe that we are wealthy for just this once
lighting firecrackers off on the front lawn
as thirty dialogues bleed into one
I wish the world was flat like the old days
so I could travel just by folding the map
no more airplanes or speed-trains or freeways
there'd be no distance that could hold us back

there'd be no distance that could hold us back
there'd be no distance that could hold us back

so this is the new year
so this is the new year
so this is the new year
so this is the new year

so this is my new year, "the world is my oyster". Why do I feel I didn't put enough sand into it?

In anycase I got my guitar done in one day by apparently paying a premium to have the thing put to the top of the priority list. Got myself vintage tuners, a JB bridge pickup and changed the potentiometers for the volume and tone controls. Workmanship seems quite ok but seems abit dodgy here and there. Apparently they weren't kind enough to fill up the old holes left by the old tuners thus letting me see some scary half hidden holes on my guitar head (probably something only nitpicking Nicholas would notice). They didn't bother to at least get rid of the smudges they made all over the finishing and originally two of the knobs were too low (which they were kind enough to raise to a nice height). Anyway, enough about the bad and onto the good. The sound of the JB is fucking sweet. It's sweet and creamy when clean or mild overdrive but very warm when put through heavy distortion. The new pots now actually make the knobs have a purpose other than a fashion accessory and the vintage machine heads just look beautiful, bringing my guitar closer and closer to vintage Gibson standards. Sadly the old humbucker just doesn't meld with the JB and as such my toggle switch has been rendered qute useless. I think he also lowered my action by a hair because I swear, it's just too easy to barre. Too top it all off they were really friendly and helpful, chipping in with their own advice but always reminding me that it was my choice and they would be more than willing to accomodate me. As such, I'd highly recommend Guitar Connection to anyone doing their guitars (unless it's repainting, but that's another issue altogether). An 8/10. Now all I have to do is wait till April and then get the rest of the stuff done and I'll have a near- Gibson level guitar for a third of the price =P.

Brokeback Mountain.... man how do I start this off? An emotional story set upon the backdrops of wide plains and high mountains. 2 protagonist that share a special moment and then break apart, living seperate lives but inexplicably find themselves together again. Only this time, it's homo-sized. The story might not be that original but the direction and the cinematography are top-notch. There always seemed to be a heavy weightage over every word that they said, as if small talk was a burden and everything had a meaning. Ang Lee deserved his best director award for his ability to keep on driving the point of the whole movie; escapism and marital poverty through the landscape and the towns he sets the protagonists into, but no, in terms of story, in terms of overall character build-up (top notch as it was, especially for Jack), I agree that it simply does not deserve the Best Film award.

More stuff to come later. Dinner calls. Tomorrow is the IT Show and my first ability to play the DS Lite!! Yippee!!

So does going to a better school really raise your grades? On the one hand, the proof is irreputable, nearly everyone gets triple Bs or higher, yet how can that be gauged when the most mediocre student in that school already has been achieving Bs all his life?

The same can be said about less reputable schools. Nearly everyone gets triple Ds, and they entered with those type of results. But the exception is seen here, where there are those that seem to rise above, getting the As and Bs of the better schools. Some of them maybe foreign students, but quite a few of them are local, and even more have *gasp* an actual life (broadly focused, you choose to believe in what a life consists of).

So where does that lead us? A person who is naturally smart should do well anywhere s/he goes. I've looked at the notes from one JC to another JC to another JC and they all contain the same information, maybe worded differently, more tidily arranged, but nonetheless the same information. The teachers for the most part are the same everywhere you go; a great teacher that moves from RJ to CJ is still considered a great teacher. So where does that leave us? Attitude perhaps. Peer pressure in youth is a major driving force over their decision making and seeing everyone strive hard probably makes one work even harder.

Thus, attitude and aptitude seem the most likely answers. Whether you want to study, and whether you can study seem to be the driving forces for good grades. Notes can always be swapped, lectures always recorded down and passed about, but the will to work hard and the usage of personal study methods are what seperates the failures from the successes. That is why you always hear our parents telling us to do what we want to do, because if we don't have anything compelling us forward, we cannot help but sink into mediocrity.

ORD!!!!!!!!!! FFI Monday, then Clear Leave loh!

Sadly, Oasis was a major let down. Deciding to take the $100 standing, we were shoved into a farking hellhole, surrounded by international students, international malays, and the internatinally stupid. The fucking Mat infront of me wanted to pick a fight with me because I was "pushing" him. Maybe he doesn't have brains or anything, but seriously, the further infront you stand, the more likely you are to be pushed forward because everyone else that's behind is pushing! Get over it, get a life and join the crowd, there's no such thing as personal space in this type of event! In anycase, we decided to move back a whee bit, into the suffocating crowd (imagine standing on the PIE during heavy traffic at 1pm in the afternoon and you'd understand how I felt) and I was actually more excited about the concert ending than the music! Liam just played the cocky northern monkey during the whole event, and hell I could hardly hear them singing, only a great muddle of sounds that became a great karaoke session. Urgh. New rule in life, always get seated tix and never buy the most popular tickets available.

1 more week to Clear Leave. The end is in sight! This has been a short update. Adieu!

so the scholarship application was indeed a foretelling of Exeter's decision. After taking 3 months longer than the others to deliberate over my application, they have finally sent me a reply. Now to goto England and scout them all out... w00000

Our OC decided to implement a new policy effective this coming monday which makes me thank God that I am finally going to ORD. In utter desparation over how to solve our problem of too many duties (other than the fact that *gasp* there are too little fucking NSFs in the camp!) he has taken away our Nights-off and instead limits the "privilege" to.

1. Guard Duty Personel
2. Vocational Duty Pers
3. Pes D n E pers
4. Those that pass IPPT and Range
5. ORD Pers

So basically if you're the 5% that fall into that range (i.e. me) you're screwed. Thankfully I'm ORDing so I don't have to worry about this hunumdrum, but this policy doesn't address directly the main issue of people "kenging" from Guard Duty. The bigshots will never understand the impetus for such a flight of personel and why no NSF ever leaves 1st Signal happy (or whit, are very happy to finally leave 1st Signal). Give us more REASONS to want to do guard duty, give us back our offs, our wasted time, our lost sleep, our fucking morale. By taking more and more away from the NSFs, you are only encouraging them to find loopholes. In other camps, the regulars fight for their NSFs in non-infantry vocations to have stay out privileges.

There's another article today about the large number of dropouts in the law profession and Jeyaratnam has reaffirmed what's been repeatedly repeated for the past 2 years. That more and more lawyers are dropping out. Apparently noone has anything humbling to say about the profession in the meantime so like a rotting carcass it's vile flesh is being steadily picked apart by the vultures. Still my conclusion has been very precise. I want to be a big firm lawyer specialising in international business and contract law, just the two types of law that are currently burdgeoning (and will continue burdgeoning) in Singapore. Every profession has it's downtime, I predict that all this conundrum will be solved by the time I actually get my bar (the gahmen won't just sit while the most noblest of professions get's torn asunder!).

People ask me why I don't want to take the place I've been offered in SMU, maybe they don't see it the way I do. To them a business degree would do; get second uppers, start working, reach upper management by 40years old but I can't imagine that. I don't want to be just another businessman, just another businessman like every other person would be in a decades time. In this life you need an edge, something only law can give me.

Franz Ferdinand this thursday! WooooOooOOo

Apparently this is waht I look like fromt he eyes of a caricature. Fark I look like an auntie

Four Jobs I've had in my life
1. Student
2. Soldier
3. Nazi
4. English Tutor

Four Movies I can watch over and over
1. Lock, Stock n Two Smoking Barrels
2. Pulp Fiction
3. Starship Troopers
4. Ghostbusters

Four places I have lived in
1. Singapore
2. New Jersey
3. Praetoria, the vast walled city
4. Nebulon Frigate

Four TV shows I love to watch
1. CSI LA
2. Star Trek
3. Everybody Loves Raymond
4. Viva La Bam

Four places that I have been on vacation
1. Germany
2. Austria
3. France
4. Disneyworld

Four of my favorite dishes
1. Bueh Keluak
2. Baby Back Ribs
3. Fajitas
4. Pizza... ONLY FOUR!!!

Four Websites I visit daily
1. Wikipedia
2. SGSB2
3. UCAS
4. Gamespot

Four places I would rather be right now
1. Anywhere
2. But
3. Here
4. In Singapore

Anyway what I really wanted to talk about was the surreality of the Rock For Good RGS Concert. For all intents and purposes I think I have witnessed our next generation, the first of a breed of new Singaporeans who actually acknowledge local talents and can actually *gasp ROCK OUT! The idiosyncracy was so ambivalent. Here, in the most conservative of institutions, reknowned for it's brilliance and berak nature of it's students was a rock concert that was anything but conservative. The concert was wild beyond words. Compared to the usual concerts held in open squares and liberal areas, the RGS concert was in a vivid palate of colours, swift, bold, truly magnificent compared to the dull diatribe of those other events. There was moshing, there was bopping, there was headbanging, it was above all things, insane. The seeds of the indie rock scene has now been sewn and it was finally reaping it's wonton rewards. Guys and Girls of 15-25 were there, eschewing the standards of conservative morality impressed on them by older generations. Forgive me for repeating but it. was. fucking. insane.

The moshing was really wicked. I got thrown around from the second row all the way to the fourth row. From the center, to the left of the stage, and then back to the center. I crashed into atleast 20 people. Got myself soaked with the sweet sweat of dozens of girls and guys alike.

The bopping and dancing was insane, girls and guys jumping up and down for hours nonstop, like some energizer bunnies. One girl infact was bopping such that she kept rubbing against my crotch, producing the most strangely erotic experience of the evening. XD

And the music was quite utterly fantastic! Skyjuice opened fantasticly, with great showmanship from the bassist. Crossbred took over but they frankly had no skill, just looks (which apparently caused several girls to swoon despite the fact that had no original songs). West Grand Boulevard was all that I had expected and more. They played a mix of MCR and Jimmy Eat World inspired music that went very well with the atmosphere and my current taste in music. There was a power outage near to the end of their set which resulted in a 20 minute drum solo and the leave of my buddy in arms, Hou Fu. After they restarted the crowd got even more wild and while being moshed around I whimmed that Houf was lucky to leave 'cos he would have literally died. The Suns played very well but couldn't sell to the crowd just like Ronin who played to the Arena like a regular Bono. Then last but not least was my dear Electrico. Amanda was trying to make another one of her fashion statements but to no avail.

Desmond and an RGS girl got thrown into the audience where they body surfed and got thoroughly molested (the guy behind me was apparently very proud of frolicking the girl). And several others jumped but weren't as lucky and they fell to the ground (what do you expect when you got only 10 small girls holding you up??). Insane. I left the place with my ears ringing, my body smelling like rotting toufu despite a copious amount of cologne and the thorough impression that I had a life changing experience.

In 3 weeks time I start clearing leave! At least my time has come. No more of this despondant lifestyle! Time to hit the books once again, time to regain my ability to speak good english! Yes this is the time for me to make preparations for my next journey in life. University!

Singapore is at the cusp of a breakthrough in it's modernity. Singapore has long been the backwater shed for asian values. These rightist tendencies have long established their routes in the major generations of society (basically our parents and our grandparents) and as such the progress of human enlightenment has come to a halt due to these two generations who refused to put aside their narrow vision and embrace the new modern society brewing around them. Modern literature already points towards this new trend in recent society so hushed up by the gahmen, the trend of homosexuality. Homosexuality has always been m00t in our society. The Greeks did it, War and Peace was full of it and Middlesex practically fed us the adroginous society. Love for one's brother should not be a problem unless it gets anal (both literary and literally). Why should it be taboo for one man to express the same love for his comrade the way women do for their closest friends? Our society needs to learn that Love exists in many forms and should be fostered; the almighty himself declared that we should Love Thy Neighbour, but it should not be taken to extremes. In that way we can create a liberal, yet still asian identity. Not too much of everything.

Exeter Uni sent me an email regarding applications for a Sports Scholarship in
said Uni and frankly it's quite bewildering. On one hand it's bewildering because the only sport I'm actually good in is Call Of Duty and on the otherhand, my UCAS application still states that my admission is pending. So does this have any implications? Does it mean that my acceptance letter is traveling over the indian ocean as we speak, en route to my hands? Yes perhaps so, but what is the use? I've already put Exeter at the bottom of my three choices. Maybe I have waited patiently for it because of the need to "berak". That I can state I got accepted into 7 Universities and that I snubbed them all (especially SMU which apparently is bent on me going for their matriculation) for the sake of a career in Law in of all places Leeds/Leicester.

On that same note I'm currently at my wits on which of these two Universities to choose. On one hand, Leeds has been around for a century and it is one of the top 10 Law Faculties in the whole of England. It is a big cosmopolitan city with much to offer. On the other hand Leicester has a much better student to lecturer ratio and there are alot more Singaporeans there. So which should I goto? My time is ticking away, and the deadline is one week before my trip to the UK. What should I do? I need to pray more on this...

The nerve of it all! Someone pinched my GBA SP along with 2 of my games! I can't believe it! Someone stole it from my office while I was away having break. Urgh. The asshole. A thousand curses on him. I hate it when people justify this type of veneral disease by saying how I can "afford" a new one. It's all folly, stealing is still a crime, and it's not as if the GBA SP was cheap (I bought it long ago for nearly 400 bucks!).

LRI is coming up really early this year, during May. Haha, I feel sorry for my understudy, he's going to suffer allot without me and Yeoh. Oh well, hopefully Mr Pan can help him =P.

This is just a quick update. Will get back to you all later. Oh I'll try to solve the tag-board thing. Just as soon as I remember my tagboard login name.

Yes it's time. At last after laying dormant in me for over a year, the kettle is boiling over. I have to rant, I have to get it out of my fucking system. The sheer laziness of people to reply to an invitation. A topic was recently raised about the lack of culture in Singapore and I at first came to it's defence; though it was one of a different sort, where I listed Singapore's culture found in our bellies, not in our love for artefacts. Sadly Vince's points weren't moot but infact absolutely true. Some people have really horrible manners. I sent out invitations to me kin, inviting them for a special occasion and I thought the matter rested at that. The card held an RSVP (to the none Wongs out there, it means Respondent Si Vous Pla or however it's spelt. AKA, Respond ASAP) with the numbers to dial and whatnot. Later along the way I happen to meet the daughter of the invited family and was talking to her when she raised up the fact that her family cannot make it (this was yesterday), because they're going for their grandma's bday. Now there is nothing wrong with that, I respect that, but what I can't take is that if I had not met her that day, I would probably have not found out they were not coming until the day itself, after I had already wasted my money catering for people that weren't even planning to come in the first place. How bloody hard is it to pick up the phone, dial me and tell me that you can't make it? Will I burst out a river of tears and wallow myself to death because of it? Maybe but it's so bloody inconsiderate. They would be fuming if we didn't show up for their dinners without giving them a call, and it's not as if they're family is small so that they would'nt be missed (Hell he is one of the most important people of them all). Is this how it is in this society? Where we don't have the basic coutesy to reply? I think back to my days in America and it's so shocking. Over there they ALWAYS call to inform whether they are coming or not, and ALWAYS as soon as they recieve the invite. Even in my books, in the 18th Century if one is invited to a party he sends a bloody reply by mail to tell whether he is attending or not! In Singapore we can't even be bothered in sending an SMS to tell whether you are coming or going. Really pathetic.

Apparently IMH uses Russian psychological torture to treat it's NS patients. Daryl told me that his friend, who suffered from a severe depression upon entering his current unit was sent to IMH for a week of evaluation. According to him, the events inside IMH played out in true Orwellian nature. He was thrust inside a pure white room, with a freezing aircon and barely a parcel of cloth on him. He was fed intermittently with scraps that left him hungering for more and visited by a shrink who was the devils advocate. One minute consoling him, the next eschewing out one verbal abuse after the other. The combined effects of this is to induce the patient into fully believing that the life he had before was pristine in contrast to the current environ he lay in and fully declares his normality and readiness to go back to society, even though that might not be really the case. It's scary and overwhelming. So this is the "social" part of our social capitalist society huh?

Been having allot of fun with pentatonics lately. Creating sweeping vistas that actually sound very listenable. Have several songs to pen but can't find the time. So much to prepare for nowadays!

1. Loose weight (5kg)
2. Tone up (see above)
3. Prepare myself for the arduous voyage in my life
4. Enjoy Singaopre Nightlife
5. Get My Driving License (aka finally go for my AT)
6. Become a better guitarist

Yeap, quite easy actually, just have to get around to it.

My headphones are like heaven. The bass is tight and detailed. Mids are dreamy and treble extends really far. The detail is really startling, so much so that it destroys my love for the White Stripes. I knew beforehand that with such a detailed headphone I won't find any enjoyment in the 2 instrument band and I was spot on. The detail there was scary, all the guitar strumming could be heard over the distortion, but due to the very airiness of the headphones, the White Stripes became very lonely... desperately crying for a bassist. On the other hand, Modest Mouse, Oasis and other multi member bands become utterly beautiful, every nuance pronounced and easy to hear.

For those that want to know how to judge music hear are a few things you should look out for. (Basically this is for the Wongs who asked me how to test headphones)

Firstly, the bass should not be overpowering. You can't go, "Oh yeah that's the shit man! pOOm pOOm pOOOm". Fuck no, bass is not supposed to drown out everything else in the music, especially the delicate treble. You should be able to hear it clearly, not having a raised middle or a pOOm sound such that you can hardly tell the notes used and especially you have to hear the snap and attack of it. If you watch a bassist live you will notice that you can hear the twang of the bass easily when he plucks or hammers it.

Mids should always be clear, vocals (which are always the mids) should be clear and concise. The voices should not go "sssssky hhighsss". That's called sibilance. A good test for sibilance would be Tori Amos since she sings like a snake. Also Radiohead - Paranoid Android. If you have good mids, you can hear that stupid robot voice in the background. Colouration is very subjective and hard to explain. But if you go for a live concert and come back and listen to the CD and find that the singers voice is different. That's colouration for you.

Treble is best heard through IMO, acoustic guitars and cymbals, specifically the decay of said instruments. Decay is how the note/chord plays itself out until it becomes unaudible. For guitars, good treble would be you being able to hear the steel strings reverbing off the pickguard during the strumming and the decay of the notes should result in a very soft, metallic sound. For cymbals, the cymbal should go, "psHHHHhhhhhh" not "pSHhht" <- This sound is often refered to as a treble roll off. Stairway to Heaven is perfect for this.

Clarity would refer to the seperation of all the instruments and voices. You should be able to hear everything clearly and concisely. For example, Muse - Stockholm Syndrome and In Your World, due to their shitty recording, sound like a pack of droning basses beating you half to death with a wailing falsetto as a stick. A good headphone will clear all this shit up so that you can finally hear the oscillation and sound sampling inside these tracks.

Detail is well, how detailed the sound is. Can you hear the wetness in Bjoerks voice? Can you hear the shuffling of papers and the tapping of the conductors staff in classical recordings? Can you hear the strumming in the White Stripes? Can the headphones seperate each instrument and sampling from Radiohead - Airbag. All very good tests.

So yeah, this is to test how the good a headphone is.

Range is coming up! After Range... ORD LOH!

I've bought allot of albums this year. HIM, Within Temptation, MCR and Coheed and Cambria have produced their greatest albums this year and all are worthy of beng called "must buys". Thus, it is with much amusement that I present my Best Album of 2005 not to a brand new album but to a reissue. Queen's Night At The Opera 30th Anniversary Edition. C n C had the riffs to keep you egging for more, MCR screamed at you with it's fast pacing and full sound and HIM was souful till you could weep but Queen combines everything, from great guitar, fantastic composure and of course, the greatest song of all time Bohemian Rhapsody. But what really really makes this album so irresistable is that it never takes itself too seriously. Freddie sings like the pompous little brat that he is, fully aware of just how un-fucking-believable his singing prowress is. The album may start out innocently enough, with typical 70s hair metal singing about a girl with scorching riffs from Brian May's guitar but after this, Freddie brings you on an unforgettable ride. Lazing On A Sunday Afternoon is the start of the rollercoaster of sonic pomposity that makes this album so lighthearted and utterly fantastic. Singing in a 30s Chaplin-esque music. Brian cranks it up a not by breaking out into another 70s metal song about how much he loves his cars. '39 is good old fashion country, showing the diverse abilities of Queen and this then leads up to the epynomous Prophet Song. It's a thing of beauty, with Freddie purposefully interloping his voice to produce a refeshing sound in the stale prog-rock arena. Then finally there is of course the greatest song of all time. Bohemian Rhapsody. Must anything be said? The chorus, the piano, the riffs, the dystopian lyrics, the greatest song ever made. All put together, it creates what is definitely one of the greatest albums ever made and a definite must buy for any lover of music. To make this CD even more attractive, there's a DVD included which has the uprated sampling of the DVD-Audio as well as the remastered video of B.R and other songs, all with commentary from the still- living members. All this for the low price of $25. GET IT.

Listened to Senns HD515 today and I fully understood why it's held in such low regard as compared to it's more expensive brethren; HD595, 600 and 650. Unlike it's bigger brothers, the 515s suffered from the worst soundstage I have ever heard, bar none. The best way for me to describe it is if I show you what it's like. {sound-rubbish-sound} yup thats right. The extreme left and right has decent enough sound. Though treble was abit tinny and bass was exagerated, it can still be considered reasonable. Sadly the middle destroyed any respect I had for the headphones. In the middle of my head was the greatest recess I had ever heard. It felt like a gigantic wall of noise was there, unassailable. Vocals in this area were weak and what treble and bass there was was meshed together and squeezed through a juice strainer to produce this perversion of sound. Sad really, seeing as how the HD600 is one of the best headphones in the market.

Radiohead's beauty increases with the amount you spend on your audio setup. Truth. Neve before has Thom Yorkes' voice sound so surreal. The guitars so thick and interweaved, the sampling so poignant, so sensible. It's musical, more musical than one can imagine. Each tiny little detail that becomes apparent with better setup increases the complexity of their albums and such just goes to show, why Radiohead really are one of the best bands in the world.

I had the greatest scare of my life. After spending 2hrs deciding on a CD Player, I plunked my money on the Marantz 7300. It offers me what I needed to make my ATH-W1000 perfect; fantastic bass response, fantastic resolution and a warm, lush midrange. Anyway I brought it home and broke out the Led (bought it the same day for 14.90 at HMV!) and laid in bliss listening to the guitars wail. Took out the CD and to my horror saw something I'd never seen before. The imprint was cracked up and there was a stain of red paint. I was aghast! My beloved new CD Player could be damaged with the paint! All $540 of my hard earned money gone down the drain in less than 3hrs! Omg, the horror! The worst part was that I couldn't do a long test to see if there was any problems caused by the melting. Went home the next day, loaded up OK Computer.... *phew* it was all there, nothing wrong. My mom tried it out the night before as well, but she didn't get far into the CD of her choice because the sounds of the baby sampling in the song she chose was so real it scared her.

King Kong was awesome. Too tired to give you a full write up but I give it a 9/10. A definite must watch and 100% Oscar and Emmy Award winner. This show is worth the $9.50 ticket. A must watch.

I'm finally stay out! Yes, ORD is coming. Merry Christmas Everyone!

In the former, man's "humanity" drives him to continually improve himself. Our hedonistic world has crafted a guideline on how to do this. Materially, politically and socially. By gaining material wealth, he raises his status in the capitalist heirarchy. Money buys him power and Power buys him politics, which allows people to see how much greater he is than they are and as such grants him Social powers. This is the main fundamentals of this world and although there are those that bend these rules, the vast majority of the common Man lives riveted by this fundamental. As such, self gratification occurs by each tiny victory that he has (Is it not the same in religion? A shepherd finding his lost sheep is happy because he has won a victory over the natural order of things which if let be would have led the sheep to be eaten).

But Man cannot continue to be happy by his constant conquest. Over time they become routine, they become exhaustive. They lose their excitement because, like a drug, more and more needs to be taken in order to induce that same feeling. Like Atlus he now carries the weight of his success on his shoulders as he continues his climb up the mountain to become a god; for that is every man's secret ambition. This hardship he once found refreshing has now become his bitter enemy. Oh how he longs to let go of all his worries and be as light as a feather, to cast away these earthly possessions! So he takes a sabbatical, he drops everything and takes a vacation.

But you can't do that! Happiness is a drug, to go cold turkey is hell! And rightly it is. Have you ever gone on a holiday before and ever felt totally relaxed? Totally happy, in a state of nirvana? Neither have I. Inside we want our challenges, we want our globe back! Nevertheless, the effects will wear off and an epiphany will draw nigh. This is not so bad! I have freedom at last! I feel happy, c'est la vie, each day unto it's own, why worry about what is to come?

After awhile though, the unbearable lightness of being pops up. A life without goals does not exist within our human template, with our addiction for hardship. The itch comes back and we must scratch. And as such, once again he takes up the hard life, because that is what gives life meaning. That is the oxymoron he calls Happiness.

Haha, hope you like it. Strangely it forces me to ponder on how much I have changed in the past 13yrs. I now love Roast Duck, yet I'm still so ever forgetful. Hmmm. Oh well, the sheer innocence of that writing can never be reproduced again. How far we've all come.

doesn't it look fantastic? Just testing whether I can get imageshack to work with this. If it can I will start putting pics up on my webbie

In anycase the jubilation of getting into Leeds LLB was further intensified by the knowledge that my best friend in camp got into it as well! It'd be really fantastic if we stay together, that way the first year won't be so bad. Still I am abit apprehensive, since the infamy of the Leed's football hooligans is repeatedly mentioned to me. What to do? Leeds or SMU? Oh well at least I got several months to think over it.

The Curious Incident has been one of the most fascinating reads of this year, no thanks to its writing style. No doubt the story lacks the flesh of Middlesex or the artistic lacony of 100 Years of Solitude but the forced perspective of the protagonist (an autistic 15yr old) makes you feel for him. I felt the tears welling up when I saw his world collapsing around him since he lacked the emotional ability to cope with such things. Still, I feel that some of the other characters were abit shallow. Does noone else sense that he is autistic and such must be treated with care and caution? Very few of the characters made an attempt to understand the protagonist and as such it creates the forced perspective used in the book but it conflicts with our modern society where by instinct we know how to tread around such people.

I've found a way to amplify my headphones without using a dedicated amp. By using a mini adaptor I'm able to plug in my iPod into my Cubase 60 and plug my headphone into the provided headphone jack. Voila, QED, 60 extra watts of power to drive my headphones and what a difference it makes! Bass is smoother, treble extensions ring cleary, soundstage is improved and there is virtually no static despite the high volume! Houf I highly recommend you try it, it'll make your Sennheiser's purr for sure.

I don't have much free time now but during this weekend I'll get some scans up for you. Some of which will be very very humourous. Take care people!

My clumsiness has led to two very painful lessons this week. I dropped my iPod and hit my guitar head against the stairs. So my iPod now has a minor dent as well as some scratches and my guitar has a notch at the back part of the head stock. Thank God they both still work and that these flaws are hard to see. I don't really care abt it for my guitar because a guitar is meant to be played and not just hung on a wall but I'm planning to trade in my iPod to get the new 5th gen and it may affect how much rebate I can get! Damn it why am I curse-ed with these genes, short, clumsy and I waddle like a penguin at times. *sigh*

At least the world is a constant and bad always is followed up by good and visce versa. I got into University of Birmingham for a Ba in Geography. I'm still waiting for the other 5 Unis to reply so I'm not going to pounce on the offer just yet. Besides, Birm is a hot spot for racial riots (although France has now superseded it with it's unprecedented week of youth insurrection. Viva la enfants du France!)(sorry if that sentence was wrong, I don't know french). Just waiting and seeing. In the meantime I'll send in my official transcripts via CJC since apparently they don't believe I got the score I put inside my application. So before any of you get the Wong (named after dear Nicklaus) idea, yes, the place is CONFIRMED mine.

Coheed & Cambria offers a delectable fusion of progressive rock and emo resulting in one of the most unique and stupendous albums of this year. The spanish guitar of Welcome Home leading to the start of a non-stop prog rock story is breathtaking. For any lovers of Muse, the Mars Volta and Pink Floyd, I highly highly recommend this album. You will not regret it.

Celebrated Holly's bday yesterday. She changed her hairstyle yet again and her dress sense is starting to get allot better. Less taiwan and more european. She looks good in it, I seriously wonder why she hasn't been spotted for modeling yet. Haha, maybe she has and doesn't want to. Oh well. Anyway we went to Brewerkz and I had to save Wei Quan's ass yet again by drinking his share of the beer. Tsk. Oh well.

Happy Birthday Jean! Miss your company so much! Now we can't watch Harry Potter together, the travesty! Remember to buy yourself an ice cream on my IOU account!

You Are an Emo Rocker!

Expressive and deep, lyrics are really your thing. That doesn't mean you don't rock out... You just rock out with meaning. For you, rock is more about connecting than grandstanding.

My french name is Frédéric Jacquemin. Oooh yeah, I feel sexier already. Today is Halloween party day! Will post pics up ASAP. I'm dressing as a Ghostbuster!

Was talking to Daniel about Rachael, he keeps on raving on and on and on about her sheer intellectual brilliance (straight As, 3 languages, 2 special papers and a scholarship even without any CCAs!) until I think that somewhere in his mind he's having mental ejaculations dreaming up discussions with her about Homerific philosophy and Freudian psychology. Sure brains are very important and I'm really really sure she and her beautiful mind in Oxford right now are being flexed to their maximum capability but from what I remembered, nearly everyone in that room had literally no life outside school (and that's coming from a nerd, do you know how bad that means they were?). I tell them I went to see a movie and all of them exhaled audible gasps, some type of flickering jealousy over how I "found" they time to enjoy myself. It also doesn't help that she wasn't the prettiest bird on the branch ( although despite the reputed correlation between brilliance and looks in a typical RGS girl she quite totally buckles the trend and all of quantum reality with her by actually being quite easy on the eyes and in her own way kind of cute with her chinese eyes and her bucked teeth ). In anycase, maybe she does have a very good social life I don't know but from what I gathered last time and from her friends... well she ain't no socialite that's all I'm saying.

The Etys I lent from my friend; for the uninformed there is a gigantic debacle over which of the two are the kings of prosumer/audiophile earphones Shure E3C or Etymotics ER4P, are rather outstanding in their treble prowress, being able to hear individual strings during reverb heavy parts extremely well (in fact, I heard allot more detail in my test run of Electrico - I Want You, especially in the strings section being able to distinctly hear the chopping sound of the muted guitar strings!) but the compromise is in the extremely sordid bass. Where is it? I can't hear it? It's never there at all! Oh bother, it wasn't as if the Shure's were a bass players dream come true anyway (though they were at least audible and of quite sensible quality). It's a very well balanced earphones but I somehow miss the mid hump offered by the Shure's which really brought out the vocals of the singer. It is a really tough decision, and I can totally understand why anyone who after listening to Etys can never agree with Shure's and the opposite. I must comment on one thing the Shure's up Ety's in. The Ety's wires are so thin and fragile! They won't survive more than 4 months under my care.

Halloween this weekend! Jean, dress up as Sadako! I'll try to get a bavarian outfit or something. Take care! Neubs out!

Vote for Muse in the upcoming Q Awards, don't let the overhyped U2 and Green Day win!!!

Anyway the food was quite palatable even though it was catered! Infact, I can safely say that this was the first time I actually had good catered food! Most of the time it takes cheap and stale but this time the food was perfect. Well almost, the curry was extremely oily but other than that it was fantastic. Sadly, the appetite of most IJ girls borderlines on non-existent, so allot of it was left over. Skyy came over and although he seemed abit tensed and lost, he was quite ok once I got him into a group with Eug and Furu.

The most major event for me anyway was the fact that I could wear contacts once again! Yes finally, my eye irritation had died down and wearing contacts feels so good! It was fantastic, finally no more useless scratched specs! Jubilations!

Celebrated Oktoberfest today at Paulaner Brauhaus and the whole night was just fantastic. The beer was smooth and crisp, the food was delicious and the company was top notch. We kept on singing and clapping along to the german prost ( toast ) songs, talking to one another and thoroughly making fools of ourselves. Furu was the worst, able to hold his liquor but unable to hold his tongue. He kept on talking utter crap for over 2 hours, only able to calm him down after promising him to bring him for Oktoberfest next week even though today was the second last day. Nick went crazy and started dancing on top of a chair. Yin you should have been there! IT WAS FUCKING CRAZY! Wei Quan turned a brilliant purple and Eugene’s ears were glowing red man! The only ones that were sober were Emman, Nick, Eug’s friend and I, having to constantly control Furu and Wei Quan who were off their rockers.

Oh but the fun didn’t end there! When we got to the car, Furu kept on talking about wanting to eat my car, wanting to taste, “the metal sandwich”. We started driving to his place thinking he was the craziest, until on the way entering the PIE Ed blurted out that he was going to puke and 5 seconds later PUKED ALL OVER MY JEANS!!!!! It took us another 7 minutes to drive to Marina South where we could stop but by then the whole car smelled of fermenting cheese. It was utterly disgusting, and WQ was even worse off because his whole shirt and pants was covered in puke! We continued our journey after cleaning ourselves and the car but stopped halfway as Nick Wong decided to take a ride home with Emman and WQ, which was extremely lucky because after getting out of the car, WQ puked all over again! So while he’s puking his guts out, Emman is laughing his out and I’m trying to sedate Furu who’s trying to eat my dad’s car!!! Yin, I swear you missed a really brilliant night!!! Anyway we finally found our way to Furu’s home and I received an SMS informing me that WQ once again emptied himself at Wong’s house! Haha, omg, he’s gonna have the greatest hangover ever tomorrow morning!

I got into my friends band! I’m going to be vocals/rhythm guitar for my friend’s band. He’s hoping to get the act together so that by next year we can take part in the local mass gigs. Oh man I’m really looking forward to it. It’s a punk group influenced heavily by Funeral for a Friend, Jimmy Eat World and Hawthorne Heights and I’m bringing in my prog-rock background of Muse and Radiohead so it’ll be a cool mix. I’ll be practicing again with him this Wednesday when we attend the HQ Chalet Party. Strangely enough he’s actually quite good in his guitar skills, much better than me in fact, but he plays bass because his band needs a bassist. Anyway today I tuned my guitar by ear man, and got it nearly correct! Yay!

Oh Howie if you’re reading this, my mom wants popodum, not curry powder. Please buy lots of good traditional popodum, not the lousy type that they sell in Singapore, thanks!!

Life is going by so fast, It’s October already, only 4 months till I can clear leave and leave this wretched lifestyle far behind. For now, sorry for taking so long to update and take care y’all!!!

The sky was dusk, hues of purple, red and orange. Coconut Trees, straw huts, loamy beaches and foamy seas, a tropical resort, a kokomo if I ever saw on. I wandered around till I met her. Her face enthused, stature in high bemusement. She was short as ever, a tad slimmer than I last remembered, still tanned a light brown, the cocoa of mixed parentage. Joyce smiled and I replied in kind, a flame inside me rekindled, but I put a damp cloth and smothered it. She brought me round and we exchanged small talk. It had been awhile. I enquired to her studies but she waved it off.

She dragged me along, bringing me to a crest of a dune. Standing on this horizon she left me, reappearing with a dirt bike. She tackled the dunes, like a powerboat through calm seas, meandering through the valleys of the evershifting coastal dunes. She eased past her opponents and reving up her bike laid claim to the championship. She got off her bike and started bobbing up and down. Hold that thought; now watch the scene pan out, viewed from some crest, a God's eyed view. She whipped off her shirt, revealing an extremely oversized (or maybe underfilled) beige bra and a stomach the texture of orange peel; ravaged perhaps by the pangs of childbirth. I chuckled at the sight, repulsed as I was. I came up to her and held the small of her back and we walked to her appartment

The walls and tables had primoral liveliness. The statues, pictures, artefacts of voodoism, judaism and satanism all exuding dread. The running inca with a devils mask; the khabal of bronze children; the antechrist pantocrator, all were alive.

I was transfigured, I was like John Constantine. No demonic forces could withstand me, withold me, especially from Joyce. I took it by the head, thumb and index digging into it's large decadent eyes. It hissed it's tales of vengeance at me. "You can't kill them with hate, you have to let them see what you see.. feel... what. you... feel.." The fire in me redoubled. I threw the lifeless rope away, robbed of it's anger,a leather slinky. She lay on her back with legs spread. Slowly she lifted her shirt, her stomach was smooth and flat. She HAD lost weight, her face was tapered and filled with a deep longing, her thighs were lean and her calfs slender. I kissed her on her neck as my fingers found the elasticity of her olive panties. My lips followed her down and I relished the view of her groin, the dense but neat matte, a column leading to the hidden sanctuary. I kissed her feminity.

I woke up again and gathered her items. I locked them in the cellar, leaving Gabriel, Michaelangello and parchment to guard over them. I brought in the Virgin and hung her on the wall. Joyce came in

Wicked dream huh? I also dreamt some french people were trying to mug me or rape me in a supermarket. But I fought them off and ran away. Oh well.

As it slowly filled my lungs I felt it burning inside of me. The nicotine rush minute, lost in the chaos of the several beer cans already consumed but felt and lingered in my lungs for hours. I did it wrongly the first few times, only taking a puff and then blowing it out, only later did I realise that it never went down to my lungs. So again I tried, and as the smoke channeled down my oesophagus, down to my aerola where it stung, until my lungs pulsed and my throat tighten and I broke out in a fit of coughing. The ludicity of it all was clear. Who could enjoy this crap? At the MT Line bbq all pretense of innocence was lost, those who never drink drank and those who never smoked took a drag; the last vestiges of our youth forced out by our peers. My lungs called me bluff but my brain, shorted by the nicotine carried a different signal. The brain wanted me to try another one, to get even more feeling out of it. Now I understand the addictiveness of drugs and the tendency to O.D. The thrive, the unquenchable thirst for more is always there, and it is dangerous if we let it overun the moral sensors.

Been reading Micheal Chabon's The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay and I adore him for his melding of fact and fiction, the creation of a fake past, a real future and a believable present to create a world that is so wholly believable that you start to believe that you are in the same world as the main protagonists. The only complaint? Why is it that nearly every book I've been reading up to now features some level of homosexuality (Middlesex brought it through the roof, hell Calliope was literally bisexual in all stages of her complicated life!).

My first driving lesson was, despite my tiredness and nervousness, quite enjoyable. I stalled quite often, but I think I'm getting the hang of the the whole biting point thing. I lift up too fast most of the time, but I'm learning. At least I do corners quite well :P. Tomorrow is my next lesson, I can't wait!

I've finished my first draft of my personal statement. It's the correct length, but it's a hodgepodge of credentials that needs to be rearranged in a more coherent method. It is a rather good draft though. It covers all the bases while sounding refreshing; problem being that it needs to be reparaghraphed. It's all there, the tiny bits of information that you don't need to include but are tucked in the middle of a sentence somewhere. The exagerations are quite finely written so that it is all true yet at the same time hyperboled. The reworking of old phrases so that it sounds new (albeit too political I believe). It just needs major reparagraphing...

10km run tmr! The fuck?! Gott im Himmel, I think I'm just gonna walk right through it...

Kinda reminds you of another country doesn't it? Where the conservative ruling party does whatever it can to ensure that it stays in power and that only the people they nominate ever get anywhere in the political rungs. Nowonder they call it Westernisation!

Anyway, back to the book. I strongly recommend it to anyone interested in learning more about the president that has been smeared by the republicans such that very few actually know of his accomplishments. Read how he turns a $2.1 trillion deficit into a $200 billion surplus, how he opens up free trade and globalization and how he brought the country into the Information Age. Read and understand why he is to this day, one of the most influential politicians in the whole world.

I've started on another book. Middlesex by Jeffry Eugenides. It's a book about the history and life of the Stephanides family, who's latest child is a hermaphrodite, a result of his grandma's incestual relationship with her brother that started in 1960s Greece. Great book with even greater words. Obstreperous anyone? Perhaps too turgid for some but the style is really delightful. It's deadpan sadness is written in stark melancholy and detailed wit, not to mention the characters are fleshed out and not paper cutouts.

Electrico concert was brill! Amanda tried to do a single in which she tried to sing a strange gothic/ german trance number. The problem was that she was very nervous and as such was too soft, mumbling through her word such that the lyrics got lost in the murky depths of the bass. Nonetheless she did present a site to behold. Dressed up in a little gothic number that adresses the little hentai in all of us. The concert began in earnest with an MTV Unplugged styled acoustic set and progressed after 2 covers (including High and Dry, to the astonishment of Seng) and 2 of their songs (Studman and one of the others). Then from there it progressed to several of their new songs, more covers and a b-side. The new singles are coming along really great and are showing a much edgier, more rock aspect of them. We left quite impressed. Kudos to the lead, who was especially energetic, stealing the show with his bopping and hearfelt guitar whines, they also brought back my faith in the tweed style distortion, which can do open and barred chords equally well yet retain a good amount of distortion.

Battlefield 2 ranked servers are such a bitch. The guys playing them are insane. I especially hate the abuse of the armour and artillery units. Thankfully I'm starting to learn how to combat them. Back shots and underbellies are sure kills! Still, my score is really pathetic. A near 1:2 K.D ratio? Pathetic....

Applications for UCAS start on thursday! Now to make applications, see what I get into and make the choice over which path I want to follow...

Although meeting Wei Quan was one of the highlights of that evening. It was quite amusing to goto the Japanese Summer Festival. Holly and Andrea wore kimono's, with Holly looking especially pretty and especially white. Girl don't put on so much powder when your face is already so white!!! More blush as well! Andrea was rather ganguro, lol, nothing wrong with that though, I know allot of Admin Support Assistants that don't mind ganguro girls at all ^_^. Ok I'm getting abit too cheeky in this blog. In anycase, the food was quite good; my teriyaki don had too much rice though I can't complain since I got the tix for free. There weren't many games so the whole night was basically spent eating, drinking, drinking, drinking and watching the stage performances. It sorta reminded me of my church carnivals, only with kawaii girls, taiko drumming and no dunking pool.

Oktoberfest is coming!!! Beer and sausage abound!!!

The application for UK unis start in a weeks time! Mr T, where's my f*%$@king testimonial!!!!!! AAAAARGh

LRI is a bitch.'nuff said. Now someone get me a handscrubber to get rid of the dirt and some prickly heat to kill my heat rash.

Too tired to write more. Can't wait till tomorrow..... almost at the end.....

LITERATURE! - You have a story...oh yes, you do!
You are not quite sure what it is, but it
burns! It burns to be poured onto the page!
Write! Write I say! And thrill us with your
unique view of the world. YOU are your own
inspiration!


What Kind of Novel Should I Write?
brought to you by Quizilla

I've been thinking hard about Roe vs Wade, maybe will discuss about it tomorrow.

I reached critical burnout by trying to arrange 4 events within the span of 24hours. Already dead tired due to the Battalion Exercise on Thursday through Friday (where I slept in a freezing room with the lights on and a proverbial rocket racketed by Prithpal, trying to keep warm by sharing a bed with the fattests person in my company) I had invited my friend over to my place to play videogames; he had begged me for months. It was already a warning sign when I couldn't keep awake past 10pm and I dozed off at 11, though he was more resilient due to the adrenaline pumping nature of Resident Evil 4 and he kept vigil till 2am. He then proceeded to sleep next to me, quite grotesque as he smells funny; a good reminder to always prepare the guest bedroom and always get up and lead them there. In anycase I couldn't get a good nights rest because of that and woke up at 6am yesterday.

The fun had just begun! I had 3 items planned out for me today. Dim Sum Dollies at 3pm, followed by a birthday dinner with Steph at 7pm and clubbing with Wong at 10pm. Dim Sum Dollies was one of the best local made shows I had seen to date (only a handful infact). The merlion joke, the reversal of Expressions, the golden tap, the kung fu fight, the mini-gambling by the adorable mini dim sum dollies, those were some of the most best in-jokes about recent Singapore events ever. Though there were a few bombs; the 40th birthday thing and the National Day mini-celebration, I felt that they held a hidden message in them. The whole idea of all 3 women going on Brazil and reinventing themselves seems to have the subverse message of what Singapore wants to achieve now at it's 40th year of nationhood. Also, the National Day thing may be seen as a way to redeem themselves after they so blatantly made fun of everything Singaporean. If I had to pick my 3 favourite parts it would have to be the merlion joke, the kung fu fighting and the part where Phua Chu Beng's Wife (I forgot her name again!) came on stage and unleashed the Courtney Love in her. Really a must see for any local who keeps up with the times. On a curious note, a guy laughed very loud at an apparent pun played by Selena which noone understood. I realised later the whole idiocy of it. Selena, the most unable to actually dance of the trio, said she was going to become CEO of the SDT, the Singapore Dance Theater! Lol, kudos to that man for spotting that irony. Always remember.

After the show we joked around with it for awhile till I had to leave for Boat Quay. Emmanuel went to see it again with another friend who had bought tix to the night show but was ditched by his original partner who was confined in camp. Using his bargaining prowress he was able to barter down the price of the tick to 10 dollars! The shame of him! He should be using those skills in the wet market where it's needed most. Congrats on mastering the fine cantonese skill of bargaining for everything. Secretly he went because he wanted to have the slightest chance of winning a car in the gameshow they were playing (yeah, they had a parody of the Price Is Right staring a cherubic Vana White). At least he knows when to take a long toilet break!

The dinner at Cafe Iguana was fantastic (IMO), the beef fajitas had a wonderful, smokey flavoured beef and the nachos and magheritas were exceptional as well. It was also around this time that I knew I couldn't go out with Wong cause I had run out of steam, I was feeling hot and edgy and all I could think about was hitting the sack.

1. Nuclear cloud created by bomb big enough to destroy Singapore will irradiate all land within a couple hundred kilometres. In short, they take us out, it takes them out as well.
2. Genocide. You think anyone will let you off for killing 4 million souls? In short, not only will every nation on Earth condemn you, so will your God(s).
3. You think Iraq had it bad? If you use an atomic bomb, be prepared to be "liberated" by the U S of A.
4. No strategic value in having a totally wiped out island that is too toxic to bring anyone in to run the place/ protect it. Now not only do you have a useless island on hand, you have to spend money to get rid of pollutants and set up the industries again!
5. Come on! We're the only ones holding this region together. Without us, you'll all eventually kill each other. Besides, we already do practically everything you ask us to, except make less money than/from you that is.

As such you can see that it's no use trying to use an atomic bomb on us. Not to mention that Aussie and USA will come to our rescue if we're ever under siege to prevent the "destabilisation of the region". So what do we need our armed forces for? It'll still take a week for the Aussies and the US to arrive in Singapore that's why!

Oh I'm so psyched! This weekend sure sounds like it's gonna be a blast! Dim Sum Dollies at 3, Birthday bash at 7 and clubbing with Wong (the Nick variety). I can't wait!

Was reciting the national pledge on monday and I had a mind-chuckle when I said the phrase "democratic society". Really I swear the PAP should just change it to "republican society" because of how bloody conservative they are. We need more progressive parties/movements in Singapore! People that really shake up the natural balance, to finally get out of the populist mentality and work for the future. Yes, the future which the unwanted generation and onwards can coexist in because their govt finally speaks to them, and not the 60yr old ah ma who has never used a PC and who believes westernisation is "going to macdonalds to eat egg Mcmuffin"

Was looking at Gavin's drawings and the abstract picture really struck me. At first it seemed each block was different emotions, some happy, some sad, some grumpy. Then I realised that the happiest one was chained down by a bell and I questioned myself. Is happiness really about having total freedom?. We have lived so long and fought so much for this "freedom". This exotic fruit which seems to bear eternal happiness and joy to anyone that can grasp it and savour it's succulent flesh. Truthfully, I've never seen anyone with "freedom" ever truly happy unless they are using it as a tool to embitter other people. Is happiness really from freedom?

Oh woe is me, my best friend has flown away! It'll be many moons indeed till I see her again.